A Short List of Things You Should Probably Know About the Greyhound

Not to brag, but I’m sort of a big deal when it comes to the Greyhound. No I’m not the niece of the guy that owns it, nor do I have an in with the baggage guys to ensure that the bags belonging to the annoying woman who’s been yelling at her cell phone since Lafayette disappear, but as a redhead who has ridden the Greyhound from South Carolina all the way across this country to sunny California, I think I’ve learned a thing or two about the "dirty dog".

1. The bus is NEVER ontime, but you should be. Lining up early means you’ll avoid sitting next to the old guy with the black lung who will be coughing up nastiness for most of the next 12 hours.


2. Bring a sweater. There is no such thing as too much air conditioning in Florida.


3. People will try to smoke on the bus. They are stupid. Do not smoke on the bus the driver will literally kick you to the curb.
4. Buses are much nicer in the North than in the South. Buses are sent to Louisiana to die.
5. WATCH YOUR BAG. When you switch buses make sure your bag switches buses as well. Your driver may say it's coming with you, but unless you see it get shoved under your bus don't believe anyone.